


Breathe

by darain39



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Feelings, Loss, M/M, Stalinski feels, coping with loss, hale feels, relationship, sterek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-05
Updated: 2013-03-05
Packaged: 2017-12-04 10:01:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/709512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darain39/pseuds/darain39
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A simple look at how each of their losses has affected them</p>
            </blockquote>





	Breathe

**Author's Note:**

> I dunno if most of this was supposed to be sad...   
> I found it made the ending seem more real... Not fluffy....just more real

Breathe

Breathe.

That's one of the first things Stiles can remember being told.  
Its a panic attack son, just breathe.  
His chest is heaving like a bellows, in and out, hot wind rasping past his lips. He's breathing but God it just keeps hurting! His mom has been gone almost a year now and his chest still hitches almost twice a day when he stumbles across the thoughts of a lifetime of empty hours, empty experiences.   
Of all time he has left.  
Of a life lived, without her.

It's autumn outside his window and the discarded, crackling leaves are being blown by a chilling wind till they fill the inside of his mouth. Sometimes right down, till they are inside his throat, scenting him with their decay. Trapping a bruised heart within his chest. Sating him, so that often he has no choice and find his eyes overflowing.

Breathe dammit Stiles breathe!

He's not surprised it takes months to learn over and over again not to fight his body.  
To breathe.  
Without her.

Breathe.

Derek knows the stones have cooled by this time and the heat leaking from the door frame he has pushed his shoulder against, is purely in his head. Yes, he knows this.   
It does nothing to lessen the dead taste of ash in his mouth, hating the way the smoke finds itself at home in the back of his throat. Cloying and cold and blistering all at the same time.

He also knows he doesn't really hear their screams any more. Especially not the way the little one's probably didn't cry near the end, pressed up tightly against his mother's chest. How softly would they whimper when even breathing became harder, when the air turned hot, acrid, deadly?

Breathe Derek breathe

Recalling how Laura used to whisper this in his ear, immediately after the nightmares started. Feeling the fire lick at his fingers, too many screams filling his head. His wet cheek pushed against her soft shoulder, letting her breathe for him when he no longer could.

Now she had followed the others, like so many shadows. Down where, at least in the dark, fire couldn't hurt her any more either.

Breathe Derek breathe

He wasn't sure if anything hurt more than hearing his own voice tell him this.  
Without a trace of Laura's.

Breathe

So much time later, pressed into the crook of his arm, Stiles will blush, trying to turn his head away, recalling how many times he'd had to force himself to do that very thing. Take a simple breath, whenever Derek was around, pushing and pulling him into surfaces or just staring at him. That was sometimes all it took.  
Enough to take his breath away.

There isn't much light in the make shift bedroom where they find themselves tangled against each other. Hot, warm, spent, safe.

And now it's Derek's turn to smile, knowing Stiles can tell when his face changes. He mumbles things about feeling exactly the same way every time he pushed or pulled or stared.   
Stiles likes to tell him he loves his smile-mumbles.

Breathe

They both still do it separately   
But every now and then by some little miracle, they do it together.  
Not whole.  
But maybe a little more healed  
More filled  
More able to breathe  
Than before


End file.
